Monday, June 22, 2009

The Day After

Yesterday was the first Father's Day since the passing of my father 2 months ago. So... a part of me undoubtedly thought I needed to speak on It and him; and me; and him; and the father/daughter relationship we had; and actually didn't have...and him. But quite honestly, I'm not ready to go there because...well, I'm just not ready. Death on any level is hard but I think it's particularly difficult when you're not able to identify how you truly felt about someone when they were alive. It's complicated, it's conflicting. I definitely feel a loss but then again, I've felt a void for most of my life that essentially has contributed to me, at times, just being at a loss! Whatevs...I'm a fatherless child with an amazing step-father that has been there for me since the age of 10. I'm fine, healthy, happy and I won't complain. I'll eventually revisit the subject whenever I feel compelled to do so but until then I give thanks for those that willfully take on their responsibility to be the single most important man in their child's life. It's a beautiful thing and because of my experience, I can only hope one day I'll have the wisdom to chose someone special to share that immeasurable responsibility with.
In other news... ah man, I ran out of time! Tomorrow I have to address the Iranian tragedy of Neda. This has to be discussed because well, the revolution is being televised, twittered, live streamed, and facebooked. Damn, Iranian military regime...REALLY?!!!
--To Be Continued

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